TV personality Karl Stefanovic poses at the Moet & Chandon Derby Eve party held at, Crown Towers in Melbourne, Friday November 1, 2013.
TV personality Karl Stefanovic poses at the Moet & Chandon Derby Eve party held at, Crown Towers in Melbourne, Friday November 1, 2013. JOE CASTRO-AAP

Don't vote for Karl, vote for me.....or Warney



Tell me it's a dream. Not a reality.

The larger-than-life media identity Karl Stefanovic has laid out his blueprint for a crack at the Prime Ministership.

It was much-expected.

Populist, middle of the road, slightly innovative, all over the place, contradictory, but full of common sense.

I hope he was joking, or that we've all learnt from the Trump experience.

Celebrities are not the answer in the search for our nation's leader.

Or at least commercial TV presenters definitely aren't.

Some of the mindless crap they serve up every morning to the masses is scarily thin on substance.

A bit like a pink batts home insulation or vocational education funding program really.

No, the only celebrities capable of leading this nation are a select group of hard-nosed, controversial human headlines.

Comedians of the ilk of Kitty Flanagan, Tom Gleeson, Carl Barron.

Or sportsmen and women like Steve Waugh (my first pick), the dream beach volleyball team of Kerri Pottharst and Natalie Cook or a real character like Dane Swan.

Warney could be another decent shout. No stranger to controversy, he would fit into the halls of Parliament if Tony Abbott's drinking stories are any judge of the shenanigans acceptable.

Sorry Karl, I can't support you champion.

Instead, I'll make a firmly tongue-in-cheek pitch of my own.

I'm nearing 30, but look 45, so experience is on my side, sort of.

I used to play a bit of sport, but have been afflicted by a dad bod for years, even before my kid arrived. Not sure if that's a strength, but I should appeal to the average Joe.

If I was PM I wouldn't drain too much of the taxpayer dollar. Enough to support myself and my young family, say, I dunno, $75,000 a year tops should do it.

We'd stick to the townhouse we currently rent, no need for Kirribilli.

The rest of my salary can go to charity.

Any family holidays come out of my pocket.

Instead of jetting around every second day draining the taxpayer purse I'd put to use this supposedly grand NBN technology we have and use Skype as a way of meeting and greeting and getting across issues.

I'd run the cleaners through Canberra too. Cut loose the far left and right and dump anyone not in Parliament for the sole purpose of improving the lives of their electorates.

And I'll happily work with anyone, from any side of politics, to get done the things that really matter.

Meghan, Harry ‘struggling to cope’ in LA

Meghan, Harry ‘struggling to cope’ in LA

Dream of a blissful new life has quickly turned into a nightmare

Fresh confusion over virus 'detention'

Fresh confusion over virus 'detention'

Thousands of Melbourne public housing residents have been provided with "detention...

Man in iconic 9/11 photo dies from virus

Man in iconic 9/11 photo dies from virus

This man miraculously survived the 9/11 terror attacks